October 19, 2006

Meet my best friends–sweatpants

Posted in TTC woes at 4:16 pm by Erin

Right now I’m wearing a pair of plaid flannel pajama pants.  Either they or some regular sweatpants are all I’ve been wearing at home for the last few days.

Wait–just to clarify, I am wearing a shirt and various undergarments and accessories.  If I know you IRL, don’t feel like you have to avoid my house! 

Of course, if I were really only wearing sweatpants, I wouldn’t blame you for it in the slightest.

Today the waistband on my regular sweatpants felt too tight, so I switched to these since they have a drawstring waist.  I’m so uncomfortably bloated–I look like I’m 5 months pregnant (without all the kicks, though).  I can’t really sit upright comfortably, so I recline quite a lot.  Standing is OK, which is how I got through my long day of teaching yesterday.  That, and an elastic-waistband skirt.

I’m only 6dpIUI.  Since I have, in the past, been known to start spotting at 9dpo, there’s only a few days to wait.  Or there could be a week…occasionally my uterus decides to play tricks on me and let me get all the way to 12 or 13dpo before starting to spot.  We’ll see.  I spotted on 7dpo with Patrick, then started again at 14dpo and continued for the next three weeks or so, so spotting doesn’t really tell me anything (well, most often it tells me that yet again, I’m not pregnant).  I’m still hopeful.

I’m so tired of waiting.  Back when we oh-so-naively started TTC the baby who turned out to be Patrick, I sometimes read about people who’d been going through IF for years.  I couldn’t fathom how they could stand it–2 years seemed an eternity, longer than that seemed interminable.  We hit 2 years in 12 days.  As it stands, I’ll either be just-barely pregnant or still be experiencing the joys of post-period spotting.  Now I know how it happens…one day at a time (Krista’s entirely right).  Now I know how you stand it…when there’s no choice, you just keep plodding along.  Sometimes you scream and rage, and sometimes you cry and hug your spouse, and sometimes you refuse to give in to the pessimism and remain hopeful that the new treatment worked.

I’m going to keep it going.  Thanks for helping me out.

Advertisements

4 Comments »

  1. Krista said,

    Oh Erin I know exactly how you feel. I hate that this is such a difficult journey and we never know where the end is. I hate that we never really get to see the light at the end of the tunnell. I do so hope that this is it for you. I hope that bloatedness becomes a permanent problem that you have to deal with for 9 months!

  2. flygirl said,

    My luteal phases are the same. Could be 9 or 10 days or as long as 13 or 14. So much for the theory that they’re fairly consistent.
    I got pregnant at almost bang on the 2 year mark… hope you get the same.

  3. SaraS-P said,

    Ahhh…naivete. So wasted on the naive. Man, do I miss mine.
    I am hoping for the best for you. Let’s start with no spotting.

  4. Rhianna said,

    Hey Erin,
    You know, I’ ve never been on your blog before! I enjoyed it, and I miss hanging out with you. I wish I had some wisdom to impart, but since I have none… I send you lots of love from Bangkok! I’ll stay posted on all your happenings…and give Patrick a big hug from Emmy.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: